BackmarkersF1 Resident GaGa Fan Speaks! @yuseigagafan predictions ahead!

Posted: August 6, 2012 by Matt Ruda in Uncategorized

Thanks for all your e-mails guys! This should help the summer break along nicely. Hope we can get a new episode recorded this week or next.

So in the midst of this insufferable summer break in the world of Formula 1 (Gah, when the hell did this get so long, 5 weeks? Seriously?), the silly season’s starting to get strong now in F1 nuts’ heads and journalism, wondering who’s gonna go where, and making up their dream grids and suffering from stress attacks at the possibility that Massa might stay in F1.
And I’m gonna be no less, so even though this was hard and stressing, here’s my dream grid (with a tad of realism, but just a tad), for F1 2,013.

HRT-Cosworth / Nº1 Pedro de la Rosa – Nº2 Daniel Clos
HRT have repeatedly shown their efforts of having a full Spanish line-up, and me being Spanish, well, I know they’re going to try their best to do that (we’re stubborn when we want to), and give Dani Clos a chance at a racing seat for the next season.
Being already installed in their new factory in Madrid, and actually getting sponsorships from pretty big companies here, I don’t believe they need the money as much anymore. They’ve been talking about having a serious project in F1, and how them being in the fight with the other cars is not going to take too long, so I believe this would be an important step for a team, which, even though at the back of the grid, has impressed me quite a lot these months, with ~80 people on the team, and the smallest budget (around half to that of Marussia), is managing to compete with their direct rivals.
Again this is more of a dream-thing, and Karthikeyan’s rupees may still be needed, but one just can’t overlook the fact that Clos has done FP1 on 4 straight occasions (and done quite impressive times with that tuned, KERS-less, badly-DRS’d GP2 car).
Just one last thing, to HRT, please, please get rid of the Cosworth engine. 😛
P.D. I also considered Ma Qing Hua instead of Pedro, but it’d surprise me.

Marussia Virgin Racing-Cosworth / Nº1 Charles Pic – Nº2 Max Chilton
I think it will depend on the money and flashes of talent they show at the end of this GP2 season, Chilton and Haryanto seem to be on Marussia’s spotlight, both having run at the Young Drivers’ Test at Silverstone, but with Chilton on top most of the time, and with the racing funds h obviously has, I believe they’ll let rookie Haryanto in for another GP2 season, and take Chilton to replace a crestfallen Timo Glock having his worst moments at Marussia.
Maybe they’ll let Haryanto in as a test or 3rd driver, but I don’t know if I’d take that role within the team. My regards to María de Villota who is thankfully recovering from that freak accident which has cost her an eye and her career.

Caterham Racing-Renault / Nº1 Heikki Kovalainen – Nº2 Vitaly Petrov
Well, I considered the possibility of Van der Garde joining in after a couple of Friday test drives, and pretty decent GP2 seasons. He’s got the money and he’s quite fast, and he’s Caterham’s test driver, but I believe they’re going to go another round with the Russian wall, as he hasn’t been doing half-bad this season, considering the car and all.
Heikki is staying, though they better get the car onto the midfield, as he’s starting to lose patience, and might go all PERKELE on them. I don’t believe his results in ’08 and ’09 were completely his fault, and he’s a good driver overall to get the team into the midfield they so desire. To achieve that objective a consolidated team will be necessary.

Scuderia Toro Rosso-Ferrari / Nº1 Daniel Ricciardo – Nº2 Luiz Razia
Let’s face it, no Toro Rosso driver has been shining this year as they were supposed to. Perhaps they were overhyped, but I’m pretty sure Buemi-Alguersuari would have been doing a much better job, and showing much more promise. Oh, well, Marko’s like that, completely illogical. Anyway, what’s done is done, and out of the pair Ricciardo is the one showing more pace out of the two in general, and he’s the one STR seems to like the most, so I believe Razia, who competes in Arden in GP2 (Their team principal is Christian Horner) will get the chance to go into the team at the expense of under-delivering Jean-Éric Vergne, who’s a terrible qualifier.
And besides, I’d like to see that move he put in at Valencia done in F1, he seems quite capable, fast, and intelligent.
(And it doesn’t really matter winning GP2 on the 4th season, Maldonator did so too, and he’s shown he has speed. I believe Razia has that speed, but he won’t crash as much ;D).

Sahara Force India-Mercedes / Nº1 Nico Hülkenberg – Nº2 Jules Bianchi
Jules has been waiting a long time to get into an F1 seat, and next year I believe will be his first, after showing his undeniable worth on the GP2 series (not many end 3rd on their rookie season) and one of the most disputed WSR seasons (with one win and 3 second places, he’s still in touch with the leaders, and he’s setting in fastest laps, and poles, so he’s talented), he’s definitely shown his speed, and at 23 his time is ripe to get him into a SFI seat.
Jules basically deserves that seat already, and he has shown it through the years.
Nico’s been showing he still has it, beating Di Resta lately, and the decision was hard to make as to whether Paul or Nico get the empty Mercedes seat Michael should leave.  Mercedes would love to have two Germans, the Nico-bergs, but I believe in the end Di Resta will show he deserves the seat, overthrowing Sam Bird and Hülkenberg.

Williams F1-Renault / Nº1 Pastor Maldonator – Nº2 Valteri Bottas
Nothing too unexpected at Williams will happen in my honest opinion. Bottas has impressed at the Young Drivers’ Test and at the practice sessions; Senna has unimpressed at races and qualifying.  I can’t help but wonder where that car would be given the right hands. The Baldini award was obviously somehow manipulated. -_-
Maldonado has shown he has the speed, but not the brains. 11 penalties in 11 races is not a happy statistic, thing is, he won’t even take responsibility! But that’s just a smokescreen, I’m sure all these penalties must have taken a bite out of his idiocy and he’ll learn. I give him one more year to, as he’s got Venezuela behind him and he’s not that bad when he doesn’t crash.

Sauber F1 Team-Ferrari / Nº1 Jaime Alguersuari – Nº2 Esteban Gutiérrez
BAM! CRAZINESS! Where’s Kamui? Where. The. Hell. Is. The Tora-tora-tora man? Well, as much as I loved him in 2,010 and 2,011, he’s failing to impress this year, and while Pérez already has got 2 podiums, Kamui couldn’t manage to come close to standing on the podium (he’s got a 4th and 5th places, but in time he was far away from the top 3). He still has 9 races to impress, but there’s no banzai moves or all-out laps from him anymore, I believe he’s stuck, and if he proves that he’s stuck in performance or growth, the team will replace him with whom I still consider a contender to the GP2 title: Esteban Gutiérrez, who’s also in Ferrari’s plans, much more so than Kamui.
I hope he keeps being in F1 though as a test driver, and return the season after.
And well, Alguersuari is 100% sure he’s coming back to the grid next year, to be able to fight for points, in a team that might grant him a future which is not Toro Rosso, he said “That’s not a future”, and not any of the backmarkers as he’s also revealed. Williams is unlikely, Force India even less so, so Sauber remains, and I think it’s possible, if Pérez makes his way into Ferrari, that Jaime finds his way back in. Don’t forget Alguersuari has experience with 2,013’s Pirelli tyres, and that’ll be useful information for any team. And he’s fast and young and quite experienced.
And most importantly, it’d be like bitch-slapping Helmut Marko, something I would find very satisfying.

Mercedes AMG Petronas Formula One Team / Nº1 Nico Rosberg – Nº2 Paul Di Resta
Wow, that’s one long-ass team name. Anyway, Nico has the seat for granted, with that China win and regular point-finishes with a car suffering hugely from degradation. Schumacher should not renovate after this terribly unlucky season, he’s got his comeback podium, that’s great, but I’m one of many who thinks he shouldn’t have hurt his image coming back, as he’s practically nowhere anymore.
So Schumi’s had his fun, and should be leaving, leaving room to either Sam Bird (2nd on WSR right now), Di Resta (much more experience in F1, great pace, a bit overrated, but a great driver nonetheless), or Hülkenberg.
In the end, even though they’d want to have another Nico German-driver onboard, I think they’ll take Di Resta with them, leaving Sam Bird as test driver again.
Though the seat is wide open, so it could be anyone taking it. xD

Scuderia Ferrari / Nº1 Fernando Alonso – Nº2 Sergio Pérez
Massa has to go. That’s the only thing I have clear from this year’s silly season. You cannot allow a driver who on the same car, with the same team, is 139 points behind his teammate, who’s 6x higher in points, and leading the championship. And it doesn’t matter if he’s the best driver on the grid, or Senna, or Prost or whoever, you can’t be that far back. Alonso’s had more podiums than Massa points finishes.
So yeah, Massa’s out, and with Mark Webber signing for Red Bull another year, Ferrari’s plans have been hit a little. It doesn’t really matter though, as even the safety car driver’s been added to the list of ‘Possible Massa Replacements’ (Yes, Felipe, Maylander is faster than you), and Ferrari didn’t take the option to renovate his contract which ended on July 31st, so he’s 95% out. Raikkonen, Kovalainen, Perez, Button, the list goes on, but even though Montezemolo said Pérez is too inexperienced, he has more or less the same experience Massa had when he joined in 2,006 (3 seasons to 2, except Pérez is showing much more than Massa did at the time), he’s from Sauber, so I think he’s getting the seat, at least for a year.
And Alonso, well, he’ll give Pérez the no. 2 on the car ;).

Lotus F1 Team Limited-Renault / Nº1 Kimi Räikkönen – Nº2 Romain Grosjean
The team will want to grow technically, and what better way to do so than having two very fast drivers in Kimi and Romain, and let them grow together and with the team for another year? Kimi’s happy, and will be even more so when he wins and the team get the power steering completely right. I don’t think he’ll move, not this early.
Grosjean, once he gets rid of his rookie errors, is definitely a future champion, or at least a multiple race-winner.
I just don’t think that, when the team have finally found stability after some terrible years from 2,007-2,011, they’ll get newbies and replace two very potential champions.

Vodafone McLaren-Mercedes / Nº1 Lewis Hamilton – Nº2 Gary Paffett (Nah, just kidding, Jenson Button)
Honestly, why do they even keep poor Paffett? I don’t think he even does simulator anymore, having Turvey onboard too. XD. Anyway, yeah, pretty boring, now that Red Bull will have Webber and Vettel again, so Hamilton won’t have any threats to scare McLaren with, and they’ll sign an easy contract much to Hamilton’s dismay. Button is binded till 2,013, so he’ll keep his seat after recovering his performance.
I get the feeling it’s gonna be Hamilton-Button for a looong time.

Red Bull Racing-Renault / Nº1 Sebastian Vettel – Nº2 Mark Webber
Nothing much to say here: Vettel’s linked to the team for another couple of years, and Mark has taken all the fun out of the top teams’ silly season, so yeah. Nothing much to say, except they don’t play nice and RB are starting to walk over a dangerous legality line.

And that concludes my predictions post for 2,013’s F1 grid. I’d like to apologize if some things are sloppily written, or sloppily thought, but this was really, really hard. ^_^. Have a good summer break everyone!
No porn from me tho. xD

  1. Lolz at the Gaga-fan 😉 Thank YOU guys for being so open :p. And again I hope everything written, or a nice part of it makes sense.

  2. Mighty logical and realistic. Probably the most likely (on average) set of predictions out of those featured so far.
    Razia to STR is a link well-spotted indeed, thought about it myself, but decided against it in the end, as I think both STR drivers’ efforts are severely underestimated in what is a massive pile of shit of a car.
    McLaren keep Paffett cause he’s their new de la Rosa. Everyone knows he won’t have the seat and Gary seems pretty okay dominating in DTM and not much thinking about F1. It’s all good.
    Honestly don’t think Gutierrez much deserves a promotion (certainly not as much as van der Garde) – call it my pro-Calado bias or whatever (since they’re teammates), but the two feature race victories that Esteban achieved were handed to him through luck and shit strategy from other teams.
    Still, all of this is looking very very likely.

    • I was between Gutiérrez and Kobayashi for that Sauber seat, considering it’s Gutiérrez’s 2nd season he’s up there! ^_^ Van der Garde is on his 4th season I believe and I start thinking he’s getting too ‘old’ (27) to start at F1. But it very well could be! Calado’s another option, but I think they’ll let him stay in GP2 another season :).
      And STR, considering Marko, is for sure doing something weird again xD.

  3. thevillainf1 says:

    Christian Horner is team principle at Arden? Well I didn’t know that one. Still, they gave even Buemi and Alguersuari three (2.5) years. Marko is a tough Son of a bitch, but even he seems to realize one year is not enough to fully judge a driver (except if you’re called Scott Speed and are a stupid yank to boot). But yea, seems very plausible, except perhaps Virgin, don’t think they’d gamble on such an inexperienced line-up when they need all the driver feedback they can get..
    thanks for joining in on the fun on the blog , you brain boiled spanish gaga nut! 😉

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